Filth Media

When you’re browsing the menu at random establishment, the duck comes with an orange plum sauce, the fish with a lemon butter drizzle, the lamb shank with a tomato jus… and the poor steak has the optional extra sauce for £1.50. Since when does a steak not warrant this sauce by default? Often the steak is the most expensive item on the menu, so can the sauce not be included with this hefty price?

How has this come about… perhaps there was a period when non sauce eaters (wimps or fungiphobics) asked for the steak without any sauce, and then requested a discount for the minimised consumption. This is ridiculous, but if true, burn in hell anti saucites.

That there sauce is sitting in a huge pot in the back of the kitchen, or waiting in tupperware for a quick microwave nuke for your saucy loving. The cost of production of this sauce, well, can’t be much… perhaps you could make a good profit from selling sauce alone if you can move 20 ml for £1.50.

But the irony remains in the alternate sauces… so you’ve gotta pay for this gourmet concoction, but not the prepackaged goodies on the table… when you sit down for a BLT and chips, it’s likely you’ll open 1 mayo, 1 horseradish and 2 tomato sauce packets to get through with full unhealthy points. All for nothing. Where’s the top limit?

Next time you opt for the extra sauce on your steak – as if you wouldn’t – make sure you grab yourself a good handful of all them extra packaged sauces so you fee like you’ve got your money’s worth. Squeeze a napkin full of half a bottle of ketchup if it’s there. Fill your empty pint glass with vinegar.

The only issue should be making the really hard decision, when you’re at a good old (Aussie) pub anyway; do I have the pepper or mushroom sauce, or is this an establishment that will let me have both. Heaven!